Just a few thoughts

nothing to serious today i think, i just got done watching Avatar and am frankly speechless.  First time i have seen it, and i was hypercritical before i did.  Mainly because i had heard numerous times that is was dances with wolves in space.  Anyway, I loved it!

I have been dipping my toes into the female world as of late.  I went to a local TG pre-event and was so comfortable around people like me.  Some of them made me feel so welcome, it was wonderful (Thanks Rebecca, Kimberly, Jilly, Marla, errr crap-I can’t remember everyone’s name I wanted to mention.  Well, ok, the “kitchen crew”… you know who you are-and I told you i was terrible with names).  Anyway, they have tons of events every month (which i didn’t completely realize til recently perusing their calender).  So, I am thinking of going to a social, and a party in the next few weeks.  NERVOUS as hell (as usual), but I certainly am willing to give it a try.  maybe i should start small…

The funny thing is, I wear mostly (if not wholly) woman’s clothes every day (I tend to look a little tomboyish though), and make up everyday.  Also, been ma’ammed on several occasion while presenting completely “boy”.  I hear I make an OK looking woman thus far, and going out as such will give me more confidence.  This, I know to be true, but it’s taking that huge first step.  Oh, and I might want to tell the people I live with what’s going on. LMAO

I still think about coming out to my folks (Or maybe just my mom).. it IS something i feel i am going to have to do eventually.  Maybe when I am closer to going full time.  And if i don’t lose more weight soon, the going FT thing just keeps falling back later and later.  Which sucks.  It’s funny-I used to dwell on my life and changes going on, like all the time.  Now, I just take things as they come.  What I mean is, I used to really over think everything, every step I made, etc… now I kind of just “go with it”.  Kind of like when i went ot the pre-event thingy.  I was so nervous, and wondering how i should dress and be made up, etc… but when it came down to it, I just threw on some jean and the pink t-shit i happen to be wearing at the moment, and go.  I never wear alot of make up, when i first started- the makeup i used felt like a mask, but now the stuff I use is really light and i barely know it’s there.  The next step is figuring out eyeliner, and mascara (I HATE having anything near my eyes).

Well, I guess I should get some lunch and maybe play some WoW (LOL)  Thanks for reading

M

Listening to-Nothing-just going on the adrenalin I got from watching Avatar!

oops also, i did add a pictures page… tab at the top or link on the side…. eventually I will have some progress pics there as well.

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2 Comments

  1. Hi M. I think we had lunch together!

    • Oh ya? Maybe downtown Sac? Like nearly 2 months ago?

      M


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