MtF-FtM/coming out

Obviously I have zero experience with FtM, i don’t think I have ever met one i real life, but i have been watching a lot of specials, and shows, and such about both sides, and something I noticed this morning I thought was interesting. I had always heard FtM bottom surgery was very difficult, but while watching a series of specials MSNBC was showing last week, Marcy Bowers did three in a morning! Granted the weren’t phaloplasty (sp?) but she doesn’t like to do that surgery, she says it’s not as “good” as the one she did on her three patients. I was so shocked by how ‘easy’ it seemed ad how fast the guys recovered. I mean it seemed like every thing was nearly 100% back to normal within a month or so, when i believe MtF bottom surgery can take literally months, if not years to be 100%! granted I don’t know for sure the time table, and I am sure they are different for everyone. I have a just over one year post op friend (whom never talks to me any more :)-gotcha Rebecca), I have a bunch of questions for, so maybe one day i will be better educated.

I realize transitioning as a whole is NOT an easy thing, and that surgery of any kind has it’s risks and rewards (I hope to one day get my surgery-hard to see it at the moment), but over all, from what I can see from a distance, FtMs seem to have faster more definitive results from T. I mean these three guys on the show I watched this morning looked like GG (genetic guys :P), sometimes their voices seem highish, but over all you’d never pick them out of a crowd. just sayin’.

OK, my wife has been a busy beaver at her work..not with work (she’s always busy with that), no, with her telling all her coworkers about me. Not a huge deal, as i went to school there for 3 years, graduating twice. So, I know a lot of them, but i took her lunch today, and she still hadn’t told 2-3 people. So they were in for a bit of a shock LOL It was hilarious… one of my former instructors walked into the break room, and looked at me… then my wife told him what was going on, and he said; “DUDE!”, and i causally said, “Not anymore.” and we all laughed. even though i shock like crazy the whole time, it went really well. VERY helpful, that most people were like “OH! well, congratulations.” Made me feel good.

Well, I should cut this short, I have a doctors appointment this afternoon, i think i have some sort of ear infection 😦

Melanie Dawn

Listening to – Simple Awesomesauce (just a random assortment of songs i love, not I need to figure out what’s wrong with my cd burner.




  1. Yes, FTMs get the socialization factor easily, as the T works quickly and permanently. But, when it comes to the surgeries, we have it hands-down. If they could only find a way to make it equally fair for both directions…. Sigh. Anyway, everyone recovers from surgery differently. I was exhausted for 6 weeks (most people are), and then the healing continued for pretty much a full year. By that, I mean that intercourse was still fairly painful for that period, although rather pleasant also lol. I know other girls who after a year are still in extreme pain, non-functional, or have serious issues, and others that come out of the gates running. You just never know what you’re going to get. Very very scary and risky, but well worth it imo!! (well, for me anyway)

    • I don’t get how (at least bottom surgery is easier for us, we have a lifetime of dilation, etc, and they are partially handled by hormones and a less than hour surgery in most instances. I understand the healing process is different for everyone, it just seemed even the 65 year old was healed up completely in 6 weeks!

  2. It’s a lot easier to take something away than give something.
    Inverting the penis into a vagina is easy enough, while adding a penis from nothing isn’t.
    We (MtF) have a surgery that is almost perfect visually and functionally (absent pregnancy 😦 ), while FtM have a very messy archaic results surgery. They can’t even obtain an erection on their own, they get an implant that controls it for them.
    Functionally as a sexual and visual organ we have the upper hand by far.
    And on top of that the practical issues, MtF GRS is usually around $20k, the MtF is at least three times higher, and depending which version of the surgery they get it there are secondary phases to be completed about a year further down the road.

    <– Helgardh from Stonewall btw, Just started reading your blog 🙂

    • The last paragraph should have said “the FtM is at least three times higher” >.>

    • I watched something (as i said) that showed Marcy Bowers doing 3 FtM surgeries in one morning where she never added anything, and that they would be able to have sex, and they’d be the size of a thumb (while not huge) it’s something. She said she won’t perform the surgery you mentioned as the results are pathetic, the one she does do, she likes and he patients are very happy with the results.

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